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PostSubject: Wonderland   Mon Jun 01, 2015 6:44 pm

Written May 17, 2014


The greatest feeling in the world is love, so they say, but if this is true then the worst must be heartache. Risk is the greatest risk one can ever take in life, because if it doesn't become something that makes you feel amazing it can become something that destroys you. So why take the risk some think, why bother with something that tends to hurt you over and over before, if, you find a love that sticks and feels amazing. Why? Maybe I'm a sadist, maybe I enjoy the pain, maybe I enjoy hurting. Or maybe I love feeling that I love someone so much it kills me...


I don't believe in fairy tales, but I believe and you me. You are my Wonderland. The king to my queen, the dark to my light, the heart to my soul. Love comes and goes, but knowing what I feel with you will never leave. My heartaches when you're away, my stomach flutters when you're near. Your lips have no issue touching my poisonous ones. Your hands have no issue touching my scars. Your soul has no issue connecting with my damaged one.

So how can I walk away from someone who clicks with me so well? That understands me from the deepest corners of my soul without me having to say a word? Are we poisonous for each other? A drug for the other, addicted like an addict that shakes in the night without a hit of their stuff. Maybe. Probably. Most definitely, but I don't care. I love my poisonous drug, it may be deadly for me and I for it, but nothing can compare to the high it gives me. The feeling it lifts me up beyond anything else, making me feel as though I can soar across the world and take on anything that crosses my path. My armour, my shield, my weapon, my everything that I could possibly need in a battle. I could take on the world by your side, nothing could tear me down with how you lift me. So what do I do when what builds me up makes me crumble? Fight it? Overcome it? No, I refuse. I don't want that. I want it back, built stronger, deadlier, more powerful. I believe this is destined and maybe I'm wrong, but if I am then I am and am fine with that. I rather be wrong and create my own destiny along your side then struggle in a cruel world without you.

Who needs true love as long as you love me truly. This I can live by. This I can do, because I love you truly. Every ounce of my soul is yours, my heart hasn't been my own in a long time. You once told me you had no heart and I said that was fine, you could be mine. You are my heart. My heart doesn't break for you, it dies without you. When you're gone it is ripped from my chest, breaking away, pulling on the tendrils of my essence. A sickly sweet pain. This pain kills me, but it also shows me how I feel without you. How life would be without you. How empty I feel without you. Let others think I'm wrong, insane for loving something so deadly to myself. They don't understand and never could till they've found one to connect to like this. Someone who knew me inside and out before ever speaking to me. All you had to do was look at me and you knew every ounce of my being. The darkness inside my soul, the pain in my heart, the thoughts in my head, my being. For you're the same, we're alike. There is a saying that every human once had 4 legs, 4 arms, and 2 heads, but that Zeus sent down a lightening bolt and split them in half causing them to search for their other half the rest of their lives. You are my other half. I'll never connect with another as I have you. No one will fully understand me as you have.

Take me to Wonderland.
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